What it Really Means to be a Coach
Coaching isn’t just about the game. It’s about belief, growth, and legacy.
For me, that started early—really early. My dad was my soccer coach from the time I could walk until I graduated high school. Week after week, season after season, he was there. Teaching. Guiding. Correcting. Believing.
Sure, it wasn’t always easy. In fact, he was often harder on me than anyone else. He didn’t want anyone thinking I got special treatment because I was the coach’s kid. That meant I had to work even harder to earn my spot, to prove I belonged, to make sure he didn’t feel like he was playing favorites. But looking back, that was a gift. It taught me how to push myself. To raise my standard. To own my effort.
From my coach, I learned the values of teamwork, accountability, mindset, belief, and putting in the hard work it takes to win—not just in sports, but in life.
Those lessons shaped how I approached everything:
• In school, where I developed the discipline to succeed.
• In my first career as an Athletic Trainer, where I supported others in getting back to peak performance.
• In EMR software consulting and management, where I led teams through challenges, solving problems together.
• And now, as a financial coach, where I help people get unstuck and start believing in themselves again.
At every stage, I carried that same coaching mindset with me:
Instill values.
Shape mindset.
Build belief.
Never give up.
That’s what great coaches do. They don’t just teach skills, they elevate people. They help you see yourself differently, and because of that, live differently.
When I think back on the coaches my kids have had over the years, the ones who stand out are the ones who truly cared—the ones who were present, who built them up, and who believed in them until they believed in themselves. They gave them a fair shot, offered clear guidance on how to improve, and celebrated their wins—big or small. They allowed space for failure, and more importantly, gave them the chance to try again… and again… until they got it right. These coaches were supportive, yet firm. They pushed my kids to grow, held them accountable both on and off the field, and instilled values like good sportsmanship, humility, and the importance of hard work.
I think of coaching legends like John Wooden, who taught that success is about becoming your personal best. Or Tony Dungy, who showed that quiet leadership and deep belief can transform lives. Or Pat Summitt, who demanded greatness while building up her players with fierce love and unshakable expectations.
And I think about the joy I felt coaching youth soccer myself. Watching kids light up when they mastered a skill or found their voice on the field. I saw the transformation happen in real time: confidence growing, resilience being built. There were so many lasting life moments and experiences for those kids—and for my own kids, too, since I was blessed to coach them as well.
I’ll never forget one little boy on my son’s team. His name was Joseph. He was a bit overweight and incredibly uncoordinated. He was shy and hesitant. Even getting him to try during practice took extra time and encouragement. And when he did get on the field, it was tough to keep him there. (soccer parents…IYKYK!) He preferred sitting on the bench and watching. He had no confidence in himself or his skills.
But I kept working with him. Bit by bit, his confidence grew. Toward the end of the season, I found ways for him to participate—places where he could contribute without hurting the team too much. (Hey, all coaches have to balance development and competition—it’s a real tension. But every kid deserves the space to grow.)
One day, his mom said something I’ll never forget:
“Hey, I appreciate the time you spend with him and the opportunity to play, even if it’s just a little. I know he’s not the most athletic kid out here, but he’s learning a lot and starting to have fun.”
Then came the next season. I was surprised—and deeply moved—when Joseph showed up again. This time, he was excited. He couldn’t wait to show me the ball control drills I provided him, that he’d been practicing in the off-season. His transformation was remarkable. He went from being the shy kid who didn’t want to step on the field to becoming the team’s starting right back.
His skills improved a little, sure—but what really changed was his mindset. His self-confidence. His belief in himself. That’s what made him a better player. That’s what coaching is all about. Transformation of the entire person, not just the skills or abilities.
Now, I carry that same heart into my work as a financial coach. I don’t just focus on the numbers—I coach. I support my clients, challenge them, help them knock down the barriers in their way, and guide them as they grow into what they’re capable of.
Because coaching—real coaching—is about believing in people until they can believe in themselves.
And that’s a legacy worth leaving.
Reflection Questions
• Who’s been a coach in your life, on or off the field?
• How did they help shape your mindset or direction?
Motivation
If you’re leading a team, parenting a child, coaching on a field, or guiding someone financially—you’re a coach.
How you show up matters.
Want coaching?
Let’s connect, let’s build you up, let’s make you elite and let’s get you to believe in yourself!
Schedule a free financial coaching session here.
TJ is a financial coach that helps couples who earn good money but feel like they have nothing to show for it. They’re unsure about their financial situation and frustrated that they aren’t where they should be. He provides a path forward and helps them believe in themselves so they can get unstuck, gain confidence, take control and change their financial future.
References:
Pat Summitt
Pat Summitt’s career victory total was the most of any coach in the history of NCAA men’s or women’s basketball at the time of her retirement. She guided her teams to eight NCAA National Championships.
Pat Summitt Coaching Record | College Basketball at Sports-Reference.com
https://www.goodreads.com/author/list/33957.Pat_Summitt
John Wooden
John Wooden is considered one of the greatest NCAA basketball head coaches of all time. He led the UCLA Bruins to an impressive number of wins, with a 664-162 record, and was named NCAA College Basketball Coach of the Year six times.
John Wooden Coaching Record | College Basketball at Sports-Reference.com
https://www.goodreads.com/author/list/23041.John_Wooden
Tony Dungy
Tony Dungy coached 13 seasons in the NFL for the Tampa Bay Buccaneers and Indianapolis Colts. Between the years of 1996 and 2008, he compiled a record of 148-79 in regular season and postseason games.
https://www.footballdb.com/coaches/tony-dungy-dungyto01
https://www.goodreads.com/author/list/476787.Tony_Dungy
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About the Author
TJ Recinella (Owner/ Founder of TJR Financial Coaching)
TJ helps couples who earn good money but feel like they have nothing to show for it. They’re unsure about their financial situation and frustrated that they aren’t where they should be. He provides a path to help them get unstuck, gain confidence, and change the financial future of their families.
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